note for my successor

the feeling is quite weird. as an upcoming ex-cultural director, i am advised to leave a note to my successor. while writing the note, every single memory comes flashing back through my mind. actually, i enjoy the club very much. one, we are very close and second, we always laugh a lot. you can say we are like brothers and sisters.

i learn a lot from this. we have our fair share of disagreements. but towards the end, we always put smiling faces to our guests. i think this is what i call professionalism. whatever happens between you and your colleagues should be swept under the carpet while performing on the job itself. the truth is, is not actually very dramatic. it is just certain people think people have bad intentions. while i am always stuck in the middle, i had always pretended nothing had happened. i refuse to take sides unless the disagreement clashed with my personal belief.

the once a fortnight dinner is very memorable as well. we always share stories, tease each other and laugh.

my SUAMS journey has been completed. i am glad that i have been a part of this. i learn to be a better person. i learn to manage time better, express myself appropriately and know more people. i think such things are not attainable through formal education.

blogger feels that a chapter of his life is going to be close soon. while he feels excited, he feels sad deep down despite telling the rest of people he only has excitement to end it.

i am getting good at this

i think i have grown towards a liking for blog improvement. the sad thing is: after i have been blogging for five years, i am still stuck a beginner's level stage. while trying to try to improve, i kept coming across tips for new blogger. ouch, a stab on my pride. oh well, at least i am growing at a snail pace which is better than not moving forward at all. some people move very slowly in life, preferring to take life easy breezy while some just charge forward like a horse. any pace is good as long as one is happy. things get sad when one starts comparing. five years huh? but i started with msn blog then convert to blogger which is more user friendly.

Spot the difference? you can't? i think the blogger's smile is way  more charming than the little monk

oh yes, i have been escaping to my spiritual journey yesterday. to the temple, happens to be the biggest temple in the southern hemisphere. my only comment: why is it located in such a rural place? i have always thought that community places should be located in densely populated region to allow easy access. the journey itself took 2 hours. the experience is pretty rewarding. found a little bit more about buddhism history. do you know there are five different buddha postures? i am more accustomed to the amitabha buddha but the other four have four different hand and finger postures. the same applies to kuan yin as well. i was like. "there are 33 forms of kuan yin". seems like my knowledge of religion matter is not as expansive as i thought i have.

enlightening. calm. peace.

blogger felt that whichever temple you go, they give you pretty much the same feeling. that makes him miss the ske temple.

sheng ri kuai le

ohh, i just remember to wish my friend, 'Happy Birthday!' on my blog. i find it more personal rather than a mere birthday wish on the blue wall. although i have received tonnes of wishes on my birthday, i still do not feel particularly excited or happy. first, there is this birthday reminder on the blue wall. so everyone will not forget. what's the point?

i actually have remembered close to hearts a few friends' birthday. mostly in january, march, september and october. i try to come out with a conclusion why my friends fall under such months. am i particularly close to friends from certain horoscopes. perhaps. maybe i will do a poll next time on the blue wall to ask which my close friends relate to. i know i have more in march and september. i have 9,11,12, 22,23 March and mine is 24. hmmm.... one of these dates requires me to wish twice because i have friends who happen to be born on the same day. what surprises me both are equal in their personality. some might say confident, other might say arrogant. to me, no difference.

and 22 march belongs to a special friend. he shares my rare surname. and his caring attitude really did wonder to my life. one, i get to eat a lot of fruits. opps.... freeloader during form 5. he is like a big bro although he is just 2 days older than me. i think he knows me well. second, he is very forgiving and generous. a lot to give, little to receive. kinda hard to such friend. i do remember kind deed, that's the important point.

i am being too far from my topic already. today is mr khaw's birthday. the surname itself is sufficient for anyone to recognise. ini pun kawan baik saya. tak tahu kenapa. dia sangat senyap tapi dia kawan baik saya. mungkin saya cakap terlalu banyak kot, sebab tu kita kawan baik. see, you need balance in life. i am desperately trying to justify my talkative nature.

i still remember he stands so tall in class that i wonder what he eats during his younger days. we seldom chat during form 2 and 3 because i am very busy, always in between activities. besides, i got a strong vibe that there is discomfort for sk students during form 2. we don't chat and we definitely don't visit each other during cny.

then we started cycling to mr teo's physics class on tuesday. tuesday is specifically mentioned because there is pasar malam every week. i am still deciding whether the reason i go tuition is to learn physics or go to pasar malam. then perg makan like nobody's business. i should say that's the most memorable image i had. eat, tuition and cycling. the reason i am posting this is because he is going for work travel soon and since he turns 21, (wth, only 21 and already so tall) i would like to give my best wishes to him. find lots of money, get a gf, be happy, be daring and most importantly: BELANJA ME MAKAN. you owe me a lot of meals. one of them happens to be bak kut teh. told ya, i have strong memory when food comes about.

A best friend is like a loyal dog, staying by your side, comforting you  without knowing what your worries are

blogger having spring break so he decides to wake up early to give a fresh breath for his blog. afterall, he has this hobby for a long, long time.

10 percent

it is a funny thing that i realise such a small lesson while watching television today. i was watching a kid cooking competition programme by masterchef australia. there were fifty kids competing against each other, vying for the crown of junior masterchef.

Junior Masterchef

first, i would like to commend on this programme. it has not only fired up the kids' spirit in cooking, also encourage people that you can achieve great things in life no matter what age you are. the thing that is stopping you is your mind and thinking. i was wondering, 'if all these kids attend the competition, what happens to school'. if it happens in asia, i am quite certain the tv show will receive wide criticism for depriving children proper education by lavishing them with unrealistic dream of becoming chefs. such thinking does not only limit what a child's dream in life but also restricts one's passion for cooking. tell me honestly, do your parents tell you to be a chef or cook when you were young? of course not, they will say being a chef comprises of a lot of hard work and we should study hard to work in white collar jobs.

Ham Cha

such was a thinking embedded on me. i think if i were given an option to choose all over again, i might have opted for another career now. i like cooking. it calms my mind and towards a certain extent, i feel happy. yeah, i am a natural high person. i get excited very easily which is not necessarily a good thing because i notice i am being misconstrued as not being serious. hence, i have tried to lower my excitement level every now and then. i am more subtle now.

back to the topic of 10 percent. in this show, the fifty kids were divided to 5 groups of ten. they will compete for one spot in each group and the rest will enter further rounds until the number totals up to 20 when the real challenge begins. my heart had this feeling of being disheartened. for me, if i were to put in a group of ten and only one of us is chosen, i would have given up. i believe such thinking is kinda pessimistic. in life, it isn't the outcome that counts, it is the journey that inspires to be the best we can be. i think by watching this show is not so bad after all because i learn to do my best. the bad side about me is that just as easily i get excited so does the pace my motivation level changes. by learning one lesson today, i think i have become a better person, perspective wise.

blogger feels that if everyone gives his best, there shall be no regret in the world and what a pleasant world it would be then.

seven early eight early?

there is this expression that chinese love to use, which is zi zao ba zao. i wonder why does it begin with seven not six or five. probably got to do with the ancient chinese history. waking up today is quite refreshing because i  am not disturbed by any metal drilling noise.

the first thing that comes to my mind is i have a good dream. the thing is i seldom dream and if i do, i normally don't remember it well. but this time around, it is a good one. in it, i dreamt of my late grandmother. she was telling me to eat "loh mai kai" which i find it weird at first. then she was telling me it is very late already and she can't cycle home. then i told not to worry because i can drive her back tomorrow morning and just stay at my house. weird but pleasant. i think i saw her smiling. i heard of stories of people dreaming about their beloved ones who have passed away. sometimes, if they want to let you know that they are doing well in their after lives, they will tell you in the form of dream. no matter how true it is, since it is good, i will just take it.

blogger feeling good.

phobia

who is afraid of frog raise up their hand? actually i am really scared of frog. i remembered once i saw one in my house toilet, i shouted. i think it is very geli and slimey. and i dunno why i am scared, just that i know i am scared. not only frogs but other reptiles as well. especially itu cicak. paling benci. when it wriggles, it makes my hair stands.

the thing is, in my family, only my mum can handle the monster cicak since she is always at home and my siblings and i will all run to the corners of the house, yelling like crazy. so i really hate spring cleaning for chinese new year because all the cicak will wriggle out behind the cupboards and hiding at windows. if there is one wish to get rid of animals, please be frogs and lizards. the thing is they do have their benefit in life. what can you find in common between these two disgusting animals?

yeah, they eat mosquitoes. but still, my room has a lot of mosquitoes. you are not doing your job well enough, lizard! not efficient. so i should get rid of you every year. and my mum mentioned that i will have to spring clean again this year when i go back. *pengsan. i dun mind cleaning, but i am afraid with the nature encounter.

blogger feeling his skin crawls thinking about these worldly monsters despite their small sizes.

han yu pin yin

zhe shi wo wei yi zui shou shi de zhong wen bu fen. gan jue shang man de bie. jiu shi shi kan. man de yi de. jin tian gan jue hao nan guo. jing ran hua le na me duo de shi jian he jing shen qu chun bei gao shi. jing tian de zhen ji guo ran ling wo dai shi wang le. ahhhh..... you shi hou gan jue shang lao tian ye gen ben jiu shi gen wo wan dui kang. you shi hou hua la na me duo de shi jian, zhen ji jiu hao lan. you shi hou mei na me zhen yang de zun bei, zhen ji bi bing zhang de hao. shi bu shi yao wo qu gao shi bu bi zun bei ne?

zhen rang ren jue de hao wei nan. wo jue de you shi hou bi ren jia chong ming yi tian tian. ge shi, yao shi hou jue de bi ren jia mei na me zha bie..... jing tian jiu rang wo jue de suan le ba. jiu xiang ping fan de ren, gao le yi zhang wen bing jiu suan le. dai nu li ye mei yong. ji shao wo liao jie ji zhi de di xian.

gan ji lai, wo de han yu pin yin yong zhi ye xie ye lan. dao zhi wei zi.

i am not your friend who does favours

it is very weird. the hype of the facebook photo competition is just plain stupid. why should you go post your photos and ask everyone to like it in order to win. the competition itself is no longer depends on who has the nicest photo anymore but who has the most friends. those who win are likely those with shitty photos and cover the ugliness with friends votes. and the worse thing is trying to convince every single friend of yours to vote for it. plain silly!

this afternoon, while i was syiok-ing playing with the tetris battle, a chat box appeared which goes something like this, "hi, please help me like this photo -----<link>------ it is not a virus." to hell with it. why should i help? first, no merit in doing so. second, i never talk to you before in real person. and the second you talked to me, you are asking favour to like a silly photo contest.

feeling frustrated, i straight away unfriend the friend. i think that is what i should do now, unfriend friends who ask me to like photos. then i will have no more bugger friends. if you are confident enough to win, let the natural votes come in, not some friends' vote. no meaning in doing that, unless the friend is close then out of best friendship-ness sake, then do it lor. give facey.

i got this thought of if i want to like the photo, you are going to be sorry for asking me to do it. i will survey all the photos and like the one i like the most. not the one you ask me to like. haha.. yes, i am mean in that way. dun worry, miss M, i dun do it to you last time. just some other random friends.

i am doing it for fairness sake. in life, it is not all about having how much friends you have, it is about the quality of work you have. if everyone starts embracing friends support, real competition doesn't exist anymore. you can say i am a little bit too serious for a silly photo competition but i believe you start embracing such an attitude in life, i wonder how are you going to differentiate true art of work and friendship vote the next time serious stuff comes in. for this reason, please stop asking me to like photos again unless you have really good work. if not, chances are you will be helping your enemies to win.

blogger feels he is the justice fighter as the rules go according what he says in life.

saya sangat suka dia

saya sangat suka dia punya lagu. haha... i think people who read my post will think that i will reveal my lover. no hope. i told you. i dun have one yet. i have been watching this singing competition shows where you have to sing the lyrics for certain part. then, one day, they invited of my favourite male artist. although i dunno what is his name, what songs he sing, i recognise the songs' lyrics. now i know he is 張信哲. his voice is really classic which i would say suitable for 1970's love songs. this song is really famous. do you know who is he?

http://youtu.be/uJm2v98_Whw

blogger coughing badly now. anyone knows a natural remedy to cure it.

Question time

what do you call it when you feel like crying but there are no tears?
answer: emotionally speechless

the tonnes of work piling up is giving me anxiety. just when i thought i have finished my part of assignment, the tutor commented i have done it wrong. hence, i have to restructure the whole thing which means i have to redo the whole thing again. with so much going, i think i won't have enough sleep until monday. assignment submission day is this coming wed and fri, mid semester exam is on thursday and another assignment on friday. i dun really swear. but this time around i think it is appropriate to use FML.

rules of the game

think about it. this world is built based on a set of rules. and the world can be seen as a game. knows the rule well and you master the game. isn't it weird for such a thinking? but it is true. the thought just came through my mind when i was reading for taxation. there are so much rulings, sections and case laws. hence, if you are the master of such rules, you shall win the game.

the game actually is not consist of good or bad, it depends on how well you play the game. there are of course winner and loser but not because you are standing on the wrong side, it is just you are ignorant of such existence of rules. if you lose, take as a lesson that knowledge at times is power. if you are sick of the rule, walk out of the game but the thing is, when it comes

back to haunt you one day, you only have your own ignorance to be blamed.

just as they like to say those lawyers are a bunch of cheating b#$%^* but the reality is their world is built based on a set of rules. the winners are those who know the rules well, play with them strategically. for you the rule might be unfair, for them the rule is fair because it has been stated clearly. if you don't know about it, tough luck.

in life, the rule of the game exist in every single thing of our lives be it, love, education, career, game or relationship. do you know there is a set of etiquette in doing them? know them well and chances are you are on top of the game.

same goes for the principle of life. the rule is no one cheats death. how can you go around it? unless you are freaking smarty scientist who invent time travelling machine, most likely you have grasped the rule of science well. (and do please share it with this butterfly soul who wish to fly out from this world) if everyone notices such a rule, will they take things for granted? what if i tell you that you only have 3 more years to live instead of 30 years. it is more probable every single seconds will be lived more meaningfully. don't you think everything is so complicated with rules. perhaps, but ordinarily, everyone will believe they are going to live until 76years for male and 80 plus for female. this has been the misconception of the rule. nobody say you are definitely living that long. only majority does.

actually 76 years is really short. you spend so little of your life in order to grasp all the knowledge of the world. just when you thought you have known much, the ultimate rule takes place. so who is the biggest ruler of all. the answer is only the person who creates the rule for the game. if i can ask one question to the creator, it would be "why such game exists?" i never say i want to participate in it at all. it is just cruel, monotonous and soulless with endless for craving of the material goods which might not even pay off.

blogger feels that life is only nice if one can create the rules of the game called LIFE. if not, where is the fun in playing.

it puts your adrenaline on the rush

yesterday i found a nice game to play with. it was actually much talked by a friend. you know sometimes the feeling of trying a game is kind of exciting because i have a boring life. hence, i clicked and started playing. it is kind of excited. the thought of you winning others is so intense that your whole body tensed up. and when you lost, all hell broke lose. you will get back in the game and fight again. a friend called it pertempuran tetris. haha. ya, permainan ini sangat seronok dan mampu membuatkan seorang pelajar yang bakal menduduki ujian pertengahan pada jumaat ini ketagih.

yes, in total, within 24 hours, i have wasted 10 hours on it. hoho. okay, time to get back to my pertempuran tetris. wait, i mean study. here i come!

blogger succumbing to his addiction afterall. of all the time he could play f game, this is the time he chooses. all work no play makes the blogger head go dizzy and all play no work makes his heart pumping with adrenaline. it is just how the blogger felt last time when he had to rush an assignment within 24 hours.

when you feeling like gossiping

you should do it openly in google plus. why? because you can now gossip with only friends you wish to gossip with. it is not like facebook where once you posted on your wall, everybody will know. in this way, your privacy is protected. personally i prefer google plus because i hate it when someone updates his/her status every few minutes like "i am in the library", "good morning,world" and "waiting for a carpark". who the hell cares where are you, obviously it is morning when you wake up and it is not the end of the world and you getting the carpark is definitely no business of mine. so in short, back off.

don't you think certain things are too personal. some things are meant to be kept to oneself. when personal thoughts come out as frequent as news updated, i feel that the it is like a human being talking to a computer. get a life.

google plus is very complete in the sense that you can categorize your friends to circles. so you name the circles and you can choose to tick them when you want to insert them for your message to be read only by them. cool! the other day, my friend, miss A is talking behind her colleague's back and she wish only friends to know so she used google plus. i think that is a smart move to vent your frustration. haha. (opps, the miss A first name really starts with A although it is done without intention). sorry miss A. no worries, anonymity is very much appreciated here.

blogger feels that google plus might just be the escapade for him to run away from the drama of F and start bitching about those bitches in F. who the hell just update nonsense again. pull that thing down from my F wall. i hate it so much.

market volatility

the recent news surrounding the economy has been rather gloom. while i am personally unaffected, my future definitely does. US has been going through a tough time. economy is not growing, unemployment is worsening. hmmm... what does it have on the land down under. probably the share market. with the intense globalisation spreading, it is inevitable when the spillover affects the investors from other countries.

the new jobs in US during the month of august is apparently zero. what does this say? recalling back what my economics teacher tell me, this means people have no jobs, no income then no spending. when no spending is circulated in the economy then business loses confidence in addition to the lost of consumer confidence due to unemployment. sad, sad. i think no other economist will be able to save US other than US citizen themselves. even one business magazine has sarcastically "suan siao" itu ben bernanke who is a lecturer teaching in university of melbourne for not providing a solution since he has always been the whiz economic kid who people turn to for economics solution. it is the very basic economy that is bringing them down.

what more can you say when your manufacturing production is sent offshore. your people have no jobs. without jobs, how do you expect people to earn money. while it is true that US citizen holds the high end jobs that requires high skill and knowledge, not everyone is that highly skilled you know. besides, only the richer investors who get richer by sending production offshore (i know, the world is unfair. only the rich b******s get richer).

the short term economy package is as the name says, for short term only. the issue is how to get economy package when US is already laden with so much debts that one Malaysian blogger has stated if the $100 US notes are arranged according to the amount of debts US owed to other nations, it can be built up to the moon. i wonder it is spoken figuratively or metaphorically. who cares, the thing is, it is a lot.

i believe the nation need to work hard. period. they have enjoyed much prosperity over the years that i think the nation has forgotten the basics. in order to buy something one has to work for it. as simple as that. even a small child will know. as for the offshore production thingy, that is a big issue. no investor in their sound minds would opt to come back and manufacture in US when cost of labour in the 'tanah besar' (as my friend, PJ say) is only a few cents.

maybe it is time for small and medium enterprises to rise up to the challenge. i have been intrigued by a friend who holds this believe firmly. she told me that she has worked for organisation who has been collecting statistics and providing help for SME as the organisation believes that SME is the one that provides people the most job and boosts the economy. i am not sure about the latter objective but i remember firmly about the former objective. SME can be brought to challenge the status quo of big company. insist on local flavour. get people to support local product like my beloved home country used to do "belilah barangan buatan malaysia". remember that. pay attention dear blog readers. if you do not support your own country, nobody will. the worst of all if you don't will be like US. offshore production but only can spend money without earning money. the rich people only care about themselves. what they care about you is YOUR MONEY. they are not going to be sorry for you losing your jobs. they will just shift the market elsewhere. if they can do it to their own country so can yours.

this is like a time bomb waiting for explosion. be prepared. times ahead is tough. hopefully the nations pay heed to the lesson "one should not overspend". i believe asians will do okay for the moment. i keep reading the next decade will be in asia. good, good. hopefully malaysia is part of smart nation that snaps up the golden opportunity. whether it is india or china, no problemo. malaysia has a variety of races that can be sent to as business diplomats to deal business. this is when racism matters. joke of the day. don't take it too harshly.

blogger feels that sometimes he is more of an economist rather than an accountant himself. the difference is accounting is so micro in the business while economy is about the masses. thinking about it, he should be studying economics all this while. who wants to be the nobody accountant when one can just go out there and talk some theories and earn loads of money.

just when you have decided

remember i said i want to further my studies for another year. suddenly my friend is asking me to go uk with him. apa ni? when i am still thinking whether i should do my honours year, nobody says anything about trip. i even think of going uk as well. then when i just decided to do it, then question comes in.

no worries, i can go anytime after my honours year. since they still have holidays. janji pergi, kan kan? initially i thought since i am going alone, so i have the convenience to go anytime. now, things are slightly different. i need to plan my time well. must save money as well. if i do another year, i can save more money. hohoho.... fingers crossing.

blogger feeling why is the odd is sometimes against him.

i have decided

this decision takes me a while to make. initially, i have vehemently rejected the idea. however, after a whole night of thinking and researching, i think this option is the way to go.

i will try to go for honours year. i think it will be helpful because i want to

be an analyst. it is actually very interesting. i am so intrigued by the fact that this job itself is interesting enough to catch my attention. i am usually a short attention span person but i think an analyst will always require me to think hard and long. besides the thought of working in a team is higher and there is a possibility for foreign posting as well.

let's see my criteria for future career. interest, checked. challenging, checked. pays well, checked. able to talk to people, checked. possible foreign posting, checked.

actually i suddenly realised this fact when i was walking home with a friend two days ago. we are talking about our career options and suddenly, i blurted out, "i quite like the subject even though it is hard. if this job is daunting in the future, i only have myself to blame because i like it." i guess, the path has been set then.

in order to be a good analyst, i am required to research a lot and interpret data. hence, having research skills is essential. the question now is how am i going to tell my mum that i have decided to make this decision. i told her i am going home for good this coming january. dilemma.

this is what chinese saying says left right is also a burden. my gut feeling

says she will support me still because i am doing what i think is the best for me.

HAHA

if i say i laugh softly all this while, i will get all the shocking faces, sinister stares and laughings. you, laugh softly? then nobody is laughing loudly anymore (mr rong zhen will say this).

i find myself laughing a lot recently. for whatever what the reason it is, it has something got to do with my housemates. they are a bunch of funny individuals. one day i should get their pictures and post it here.

good, good. although the place i am staying here is quite compact, i like the house because of their presence. do cheer up my day. my laughter is worth a lot okay? when i am not around, you will definitely miss it. i bet 10 bucks on it. then it will be too late. thank you, i know they are seductive and catch a lot of attention. yet they are memorable. HAHA.

blogger is finding himself succumbing to the daily eccentricities amazingly humourous.