little did i know that i show sign of being an introvert. i always thought i am an extrovert. confidence at fault. i have mistakenly thought that being comfortable in social events makes me an extrovert. wrong. here is a little article extracted from someone's blue wall.
1) We don’t need you to care about our birthday. (blogger: yes, i support this argument)
Yeah, we don’t. We have friends who genuinely know us and care, if we care. However, an interesting thing about introverts, is some don’t need to celebrate it. We’re okay with quietly honouring the day on our own or with a group of friends we’ve carefully selected. We don’t have to let the world know.
2) We are not really listening as you recount your weekend. ( blogger: no, in all honesty, i sincerely want to know how you spend your weekend.)
Unless you are part of our circle of friends, we don’t care what you did last weekend. We are of the mind that everyone has a right to privacy, and if you chose to spend it in a drunken stupor or beating down the door of your ex, then that is up to you. We don’t judge, and find it takes too much energy to give it to people we don’t know. Just because we work with you, that doesn’t mean we know you.
3) We hate crowds. (blogger: agreed)
3) We hate crowds. (blogger: agreed)
Large groups of people make us tired. All the stimulation of having so many different types from all walks of life can make us a little woozy. Some introverts are empaths, so they tend to take on the energy of others easily. We sometimes feel like we “know” everyone in the room and get easily overwhelmed with the swirl of activity.
4) We don’t really like networking events. (blogger: true)
4) We don’t really like networking events. (blogger: true)
This is especially hard for introverts who run a business. Networking makes us feel like we have to perform. We struggle to say the right thing and listen attentively. We don’t really care since we don’t know you. Even in business, we have to feel connected to someone on another level to get the most out of a networking type of event. This takes time, and choosing the right event, and coming up with a plan to offer value to others, while getting some for ourselves.
5) We force ourselves to act like we like you. (blogger: no la, actually I am quite real no matter where I go, definitely the one who like you. for one thing, I dislike acting)
5) We force ourselves to act like we like you. (blogger: no la, actually I am quite real no matter where I go, definitely the one who like you. for one thing, I dislike acting)
This is the nasty truth. We know who we like and don’t. It can stem from many reasons that can have its roots in childhood to what we ate for breakfast this morning. Don’t take it personally. We appreciate honesty, and sometimes it hurts. To survive, we have to supersede these feelings and be nice. Nice can be harder than being real.
6) We know how to get stuff done. (blogger: i love emails, best invention ever)
6) We know how to get stuff done. (blogger: i love emails, best invention ever)
We pack our alone time with activities–projects, phone calls, emails, rough drafts and blueprints for world takeover of our next big idea (which we have lots of). We value solitude because it lets us experiment with new concepts, plan and stretch our imagination. Anything is possible when we spend time alone, and what we create may change our lives, and yours, too.
7) We like to write things out. (blogger: guilty of this one)
We love email because it helps us get what we need without interruptions. Interruptions throw us off course, and we need to expend more energy to get back on track. So, please don’t call unless it is a close-ended question.
7) We like to write things out. (blogger: guilty of this one)
We love email because it helps us get what we need without interruptions. Interruptions throw us off course, and we need to expend more energy to get back on track. So, please don’t call unless it is a close-ended question.
8) We feel safe with the right people. (blogger: who doesn't?)
When we have the right people in our lives, we give our all. We give our best selves. We become protective warriors who will fight almost any cause for someone we love. Just ask our friends. We blossom in the right company, and shine. It takes us time to find the right people, and when we do, we don’t hold back.
9) We do have friends, who really like us. (blogger: Ahoy!)
Introverts like people, and people like us. Most introverts have no issue with hanging out in groups, and spending time with others. If we have friends, it’s because we consciously chose them. We’ve put effort into the relationship, and our friends know that. We go to bars, parties, and meet new people. The difference is that not everyone we meet becomes a friend.
9) We do have friends, who really like us. (blogger: Ahoy!)
Introverts like people, and people like us. Most introverts have no issue with hanging out in groups, and spending time with others. If we have friends, it’s because we consciously chose them. We’ve put effort into the relationship, and our friends know that. We go to bars, parties, and meet new people. The difference is that not everyone we meet becomes a friend.
10) We can do the extrovert thing, for a while. (blogger: no, i don't do it anymore, not even for the sake of entertaining, I am turning into a recluse)
We have to do that to get along. We can be the life of the party, host the networking event, and be the chairperson of the charity. We do this willingly, knowing that at the end of the day we can go home. When we get there, it may take days, or weeks to replenish ourselves, and feel ready to do that again.
11) We are not shy, rude or uptight. (blogger: yes, i am not shy, a little rude and very sociable)
At first, we may seem that way. Get to know us, and we can actually make you laugh, and hold a conversation that lasts more than 15 minutes. The thing is, we don’t share this with everyone. Being “social” or “sociable” is an option, not a way of being. We can’t fake happy or excited really well, and we show what we think on our face, not as much in our words.
12) We are okay alone. (blogger: i need my reading time, anime time, drama time)
11) We are not shy, rude or uptight. (blogger: yes, i am not shy, a little rude and very sociable)
At first, we may seem that way. Get to know us, and we can actually make you laugh, and hold a conversation that lasts more than 15 minutes. The thing is, we don’t share this with everyone. Being “social” or “sociable” is an option, not a way of being. We can’t fake happy or excited really well, and we show what we think on our face, not as much in our words.
12) We are okay alone. (blogger: i need my reading time, anime time, drama time)
We have lots going on in our heads and don’t need more. Unlike our extrovert counterparts, we don’t need others for stimulation. We’re constantly working out life in our heads. We entertain ourselves with creative projects and know how to take ourselves out for a good time. More people, means more stuff to deal with, and we’ve got enough of our own energy to hold.
13) We hate small talk. (blogger: yalor)
13) We hate small talk. (blogger: yalor)
We’re thinkers, and we relish conversations about big ideas, theories and ideals. We rarely get into small talk and do so comfortably.
14) We make a choice to be with you–appreciate it. (blogger: secretly hoping that all my friends know this)
14) We make a choice to be with you–appreciate it. (blogger: secretly hoping that all my friends know this)
We value our alone time and are picky about who we let in. Letting in the wrong person will drain us, leaving nothing for ourselves. We tend to attract extroverts who suck our energy, and search out likeminded introverts for our groundedness, deep thinking and sense of control. We appreciate our time with other introverts and have an understanding of each other’s limits and boundaries.
Out of the 14 points stated in the article, 12 really resemble who i am. i have no idea. at certain point in time, probably during university time, i begin to abhor huge gathering. i always told my uni mates, 7-9 people are cool. anymore than that, i am out. i like to hang out with close friends. i guess there is nothing wrong in how i acted then. because i am just who i am. do you like me the way it is?
reminds me of the joyous time we travelled in taipei |
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